“March 2012. I’m so depressed and I know I need something to change. I need ME to change. Again. The weight roller coaster that is my life needs to stop. I texted Emily to see if she’d be willing to take me on as a client. I had seen a few of her posts about her nutrition program and thought I should try it. Why not? I’d tried just about everything else at this point.

WinnerI’ll never forget meeting with her at her gym. I was so embarrassed I had let myself go so far. All I could do was cry. She didn’t even have to sell me on anything. I was in 100%. She put me on her nutrition program and we set out a personal training schedule. By the time I left I felt better. I felt like this was going to be the change I needed. The first day was so hard. Emily agreed to take me on as a client as long as I agreed to do before photos…with my shirt off. Are you kidding me? Here come the tears again, but I NEED her help and am willing to do it. I am SO GLAD I agreed to those photos.

I lost 16 lbs the first month. But I didn’t really notice the difference till I saw the before and after photos side by side. I was still embarrassed, but I felt like I had control for the first time in forever.Then one week into the second month I had two major hits. The death of a close friend, and an accident a day later where I severely sprained my ankle.

The old depressed┬áPaula would have crumbled and thrown in the towel. Not this time. I never cancelled a single personal training session…I showed up at the gym with an orthopedic boot on! Craziness! I saw continued success with the program and felt better than I had my whole life.

I then went to spend a few months with family over the holidays. And I got derailed. Again. I’m not blaming my family, but I never realized how much of a feeder my mother is. She will literally keep giving you choices of food until you eat something and I hated to upset her. I love her. So I put a lot of weight back on. I started feeling the old, depressed Paula creep back.

I came home and said ENOUGH. I rededicated myself to the Lean Life Nutrition Program. I realized that I have the tools I need to make healthy choices and it’s all in MY hands. I’ve learned how different foods make me feel, which makes making healthy choices so much easier. I’ve learned to tell my mother NO and mean it. I’m more confident and happy than I have ever truly been. My relationship with my husband is the best it’s been in 13 years. I’m no longer a slave to the scale (but I sure do LOVE that I’m about to see the 130s!!). I’m happy. Plain and simple. Funny that saying that and owning that can bring tears to my eyes. But it does. I’m happy.”

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